Poutine as your potential hookup
Your significant other wrapped up into one beautiful poutine:
Traditional: Your classic all American- he wears khakis and a button down every time you’re out. He orders a Canadian because he would never stray from the four draughts at Ale. Also he only goes to Ale.
Ingredients: fries, gravy and cheese.
Pulled Pork: You ordered this in spite of your Jewish boyfriend; He made you fast for Yom Kippur even though you aren’t even Jewish. It tastes just like bubbies’ brisket- or dare we say even better.
Ingredients: fries, gravy, cheese and pulled pork.
Montreal Poutine: He’s French, wears joggers and probably has a man bun or at least a half man bun. He complains about the smoked meat and everything else in the Poutine because it isn’t from Schwartz.
Ingredients: Traditional + smoked meat, mustard and one dill pickle.
Nacho Grande: Looking to spice up your love life? Add jalapeño. This person’s hips definitely don’t lie. They tear up the dance floor and they don’t care who is watching: See @queens_snaps
Ingredients: Traditional + chili, salsa, sour cream, guacamole, jalapeno
Country Style: He grew up in Kingston, or a small town surrounding it. (townie) He wears work boots to bar and one of those thick plaid coats. He makes you wonder if he owns more than one pair of jeans. This person could also potentially wear crocs around the house.
Ingredients: traditional + grilled chicken, bacon, mushrooms, caramelized onions, green peas
Veggie Deluxe: This guy is “gluten free” but he doesn’t actually know what this means. He wears hemp bracelets and can be spotted in the bar by his non-ironic beanie.
Ingredients: Traditional (with veggie gravy) + mushrooms, caramelized onions and baby green peas.
“WOW size” of any poutine: This guy is HUNGRY; he probably plays all the sports and goes to Canteen with his team. They sit around one large table and chant at each other to finish their team pitcher. He’s a full foot taller than you and probably has a tattoo of his high school’s sport team.
Ingredients: Any poutine just extra large